Not every workplace is bad
Lois found herself in a tough spot at work. Her manager was inexperienced and took credit for Lois's accomplishments while blaming her for any mistakes. This situation caused Lois to feel anxious and lose her sense of self. Eventually, she sought therapy and was directed to Twining Enterprise where she met Amina. Amina provided Lois with a fresh, knowledgeable, and unbiased perspective. Through their interactions, Lois began to recognize her worth in the workplace and gained the strength to leave her job and find a new one where she feels valued and happy. It was a difficult journey for Lois, but now she shares her story to inspire others to leave toxic work environments and find something better. She is grateful to Amina and the entire Twining organization for their free and invaluable support.
Challenging manager at work
Working at my previous company was quite challenging. I was in a managerial position, but unfortunately, my own manager lacked experience in her role. She had a very direct approach and expected more work to be done than could realistically be achieved within regular working hours. Not only did she expect long hours, including weekends, but she also promised that it would only be for a year, yet it continued for well over three years, without any extra pay. To make matters worse, she wanted me to improve my professional skills by taking training courses during my personal time in the evenings.
On top of all this, I was constantly being blamed for various things at work. Many times, it was because she changed her mind or forgot what she had previously said, but I was the one accused of not following instructions correctly. This was not just happening to me, but others as well. However, my experience was particularly terrible because as a manager, I had to make decisions that affected not only myself but also my team. So the consequences of any mistakes or unfair treatment impacted all of us.
My manager also showed a lack of respect towards me, and all of this amounted to workplace harassment. I endured this situation for three years, but I finally reached my breaking point. I felt like a completely different person and had no idea what each day would bring or what my manager would expect from me. Despite my efforts to stay positive, anxiety and nervousness took over.
That's when I decided to seek psychological therapy to help myself cope. Throughout six therapy sessions, I learned techniques to communicate assertively with my manager about how I was feeling. The conclusion was that the problem was not me, but it was my manager's behaviour.
During one incident when my manager raised her voice at me, I took the opportunity to address it professionally by sending an email explaining how her actions were negatively impacting my reputation and the team dynamics. This led to a meeting with her, where she tried to turn the tables on me by bringing up various examples of my supposed wrongdoings, supported by inaccurate evidence. It was clear that she was trying to harass me again by gaslighting.
Finding Twining Enterprise!
Feeling exhausted, I sought support from my therapist and even consulted with my GP. Simple everyday tasks felt overwhelming, and the situation at work was taking a toll on my mental and physical well-being.
That's when I discovered Twining Enterprise through my therapist's referral. Amina, my Employment Specialist, provided valuable advice on how companies should be run and what my rights were. Having an outside perspective was incredibly helpful and boosted my confidence to believe that I could find a job elsewhere. I was in such a desperate and depressed state that I couldn't build my own confidence, so having someone guide me through the process meant the world to me.
Amina also assisted me with mock interviews and helped me improve my CV. It was an incredible relief to receive this support free of charge, as such services are usually expensive. Amina was there for me whenever I needed assistance, whether it was over the phone, through video chats, or any other method of communication. After I secured my new job, the first person I called, besides my husband, was Amina! She deserved to hear the good news too.
Amina also guided me in building my professional network on LinkedIn, which has become an invaluable source of support in my current and future endeavours.
Not all workplaces are bad!
Now in my new job, I initially feared that I would encounter a similar situation, but I soon realized that it was just that specific person in my old job. I am grateful to be in an environment that respects me.
I finally feel like I am getting back to the person I was before starting that old job. I am 90% back to being myself! I am also thoroughly enjoying meeting new people. It's surprising to say this, but I'm glad that the incident happened as it forced me to leave that stressful job. I almost accepted the situation as it was, but now I know that not all workplaces are like that.
If anyone reading this is going through a similar experience, my message to you is that not every workplace is bad. If your current workplace is making you feel miserable, don't hesitate to leave and find something better. You deserve to work in an environment that values your well-being and happiness. Working hard shouldn't mean sacrificing your entire life for one organization.
I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to Amina and the entire Twining organization – especially because their support is free. When you feel trapped in a toxic work situation, you need someone to help you escape, but often the offered help is unaffordable. However, Twining is different. They provide their services at no cost, which is absolutely amazing!